Apologize

There is a song by OneRepublic ft. Timbaland entitled “Apologize”.

My mother used to play it repeatedly. Constantly, really. In the house, on her phone…she even made it her ringtone. It always focused on the chorus:

That it’s too late to apologize.
It’s too late.
I said it’s too late to apologize.
It’s too late.
Too late, oh uh

My mother played it so much that now the song is ruined for me. It was her way of sending a message to the family. She believed we owed her apologies. But for what? What did I do to her?

I didn’t follow her rules closely enough?

I didn’t do everything she wanted?

I went against her a few too many times?

I was better than her, more intelligent than her, more skilled than her?

I existed?

That is the scheming cry of the narcissist. Everything is about them. The world owes them. Everyone bow down. Honor the dishonorable.

My mother is the one that owes the world an apology. My mother is the one that owes me an apology. But the words “I’m sorry” will never once leave her lips. Because she is a narcissistic sociopath. She will never do wrong. Everyone else is wrong.

I’m not sorry.

9 thoughts on “Apologize

  1. My dad was like this….I never figured out what exactly it was that I had done. In his mind I think everyone on the planet was somehow responsible for his troubles. It certainly wasn’t HIS fault his life wasn’t everything he thought he deserved.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You never figured it out because you didn’t do anything wrong.

      I’m sorry you grew up with a parent like that. It’s not fair. It’s weird how similar narcissists are. Like they all read from the same guide on how to be a narcissist.

      Liked by 1 person

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